On Reinvention.

Approximately every 3 or 4 years, I reinvent myself. It's why my nickname is "Phoenix."

Let me explain.

I was blessed/cursed with the artist's mentality. I dive very deeply into my emotional layers originally as a songwriter and dancer and now as a scent artisan and designer. Those dives constantly unearth some hidden angst or self-limiting inner speak that hinder my growth. By diving in and challenging even my own beliefs about what is right and just, I'm able to stay dynamic and open to the possibilities vs. becoming wooed by money or material or conventional wisdom. I'm a gypsy by nature and incredibly curious. I find that life offers you so many little clues along the way and opportunities to grow and excel beyond even your own imagination. But we often fall victim to doing what's easy, expected and in line with what the masses are doing. I cringe at the word "normal" because it's dictatorial and fluid. What is normal, exactly? And what if I disagree?

My reinvention is centered around mindset. I had a great childhood for the most part, but peppered with some abuses that would fold most people. I learned resiliency and self belief probably at too early an age, but it seems to have worked for me. (It's in the book.) I was never really noticeably awkward, but I've never really felt understood and my decisions are often questioned by those in the masses. Sure, I've had some catastrophic failures, but I'm still here. I've also had some epic triumphs, yet I'm still hungry. My deep dives and reemergence are focused on taking an audit of my heart, my mind, what I believe to be true, what I've accepted as false and putting them through a sieve. The fluid runs through and I'm left with the things that really matter. From those things I'm able to adjust my thinking and assumptions, try a few "new things," and create a new roadmap based on some of the information from my past, not all.

Life, these days, is everchanging. To live in a technologically dominated world you have to stay sharp. The sad part is people are forgetting that you have to stay alive INSIDE as well and understand who you are, what you believe to be true, and what impact your individual contribution will be to the world. I see highly functioning empty shells of people way more often than I see people who exude a true sense of self, confidence, humility and empathy. We as a generation have handed over the reins and the horses are bolting. We need to turn off, tune out, and dive inward sometimes in order to reemerge as even better versions of ourselves. I believe society would be less unforgiving, negative and centered around avarice. 

So I do my part. I'm doing it right now, in fact. I've had an incredibly challenging and disappointing year so far, but it's the best thing that could have happened to me. I'm auditing every belief, every friend, every word I speak, every failure, every triumph...everything. There's an answer to the strife and there's a lesson to be extracted. I will find it. And once I do, I'll reemerge better than ever.

I'm Phoenix.

Phoenix NormandComment